Another man stuffed between my legs

This thing with Snuffe is getting completely ridiculous. I tell you, he is scary. Not a very nice stuffed pet. When Tom was in Canada, I left him on the bedside table instead of having him in bed. I had a really hard time sleeping because Snuffe was staring at me the whole night. He didn't close his eyes once. Not a single time.

Last night, when Tom was finally back and insisted on having Snuffe in bed again, I woke up in the middle of the night and found Snuffe between my legs! When I confronted Tom, he had the guts to blame me! Then he ask me if I was aware of the fact that Snuffe actually isn't a man, but a butch lesbian.

Tsk. There is something very fundamental that I don't get here. Is that actually supposed to make things better?

Canada took Tom

When I woke up this morning, Tom was gone. I turned around and saw Snuffe lying next to me. It turns out that Canada took Tom. As I am writing this, he is in a plane somewhere between Montreal and Quebec.