Tom sings the blues

Life with Tom will never be boring. Never. Ever.

Here is an example. I just got my period this morning and couldn't stop complaining about my aching ovaries. Tom just hugged me, and while slowly massaging my stomach, he sang a song about my ovaries. We named it the "Ovarian blues".

Tom's blues beats any hot water bottle in the world.

Screaming babies and celebrities

Image: photoshopnerds.com

I think really weird things sometimes. Really, the only thing that saves me from getting branded a complete idiot is either that the person I am talking to (1) assumes I am joking, (2) stopped listening a long time ago because I am talking too much, (3) is an idiot.

Due to the weirdness of my statements and comments, I get really (and I really mean really) happy whenever somebody actually understands me or says something equally idiotic. It doesn't happen often, but when it actually happens it feels like finding a new friend or a twin that you didn't know existed because she was adopted by another family right after you were born, or something.

I found one of those long-lost twins the other day. I saw a movie, Say Anything. In one of the last scenes the female lead character starts rambling about her fear of flying and about the fact that knowing that there are small babies on board the plane makes her feel more relaxed; unless the babies are crying, because that makes her think that the babies know something that nobody else on the plane knows: the plane is going to crash.

My mind works exactly the same way. I hate flying. I always prepare to die when I fly. I call family, friends, former lovers, and teachers who didn't give me an A and ask for forgiveness. There are only two things in this world that can make me feel relaxed at take-off: (calm) babies and celebrities. I know it doesn't make much sense, but to me it does.

It's like: Why the heck would God kill someone who obviously is on a mission?

Kate and etno makes Keno, or something

Image: style.com

People say that etno/tribe is going to be one of many big trends this year. At first, I was skeptical, but Kate made me change my mind in a split second.

Say anything, wear the right thing

Image: The Tales of Mama D

Wondering what to wear this spring? My humble recommendation is that it is now time to take a look at that wonderful late 80's/early 90's fashion of movies like Say Anything and Roller Boys. Swedish Shire Raghe knows how to rock that particular fashion boat.

Whether you like it or not, it looks like the ankle sneakers, khaki fabrics, cute flowery dresses and in-you-face neon colors are back to stay.

For a little while, at least.

Anna has grown up

Little Anna Paquin has grown up and looks stunning. Black dress. Burgundy lips.

I wonder when it's time for me to grow up.

Love IRL

Almost.

Om jag väljer att skriva riktigt långa titlar slutar ni läsa då?

Image: Amazon.com

Jag är en sucker för långa boktitlar. Titlar som nästan är som en berättelse i sig. Ni vet ju redan att jag tycker om Things I've learned from women who dumped me. Andra favoriter är The thing about life is that one day you'll be dead, The curious incident of the dog in the night time och No one belongs here more than you.

I Sverige är Bodil Malmsten de långa titlarnas okrönta drottning: Det är ingen ordning på mina papper; Den dagen kastanjerna slår ut är jag långt härifrån; Det är fortfarande ingen ordning på mina papper; För att lämna röstmeddelande, TRYCK STJÄRNA; Hör bara hur ditt hjärta bultar i mig; Nakna damer på nedre botten mittemot; Kom och hälsa på mig om tusen år.

Poesi på hög nivå. Att Bodils dotter Stefania är en riktigt duktig grafisk designer gör Bodil bara ännu mer beundransvärd, på något sätt.

Det sägs att den längsta boktiteln någonsin skrivits av Nigel Tomm:

Selected Works of Nigel Tomm (2006/2007) (Shakespeare's Sonnets Remixed 2006 / Shakespeare's Hamlet Remixed 2007 / Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet Remixed 2007 / Including Previously Unpublished Elvis Presley's Love Me Tender Remix 2007) Nigel Tomm is The Winner of The Anonymous Writers Club Award 2006 for The Best Anonymous Writer / Deconstructed Poetry Award 2006 for Innovations and Teamwork in Poetry / Decadence Prize 2007 for The Lifestyle / Flashy Rococo Coco Award 2006 for Flashy Thoughts / Baby Boomers Award 2006 for The Best Marketing / Anonymous Artists Prize 2007 for The Best Anonymous Artist / Life Academy Award 2006 for Ignorance of Some Aspects of Life / Graphomania Award 2007 for Writing / Formal English Institute Award 2006 for English Grammar Improvements / House of Original Remixes Award 2006 for Creativity / WordKillers Award 2006 for Killing Some Words Sometimes in Some Books / iStyle Award 2006 for Being Unnamed Style Icon / Librarians Under Sixty Award 2007 for Staying Young / Comedy Association Award 2007 for The Best Drama / Happy Dramatists Award 2006 for The Realest Reality Show / New Forms Award 2006 for Rediscovering Something Old / Best of The Best Award 2007 for Being The Best of The Bests / Alaska Lifetime Achievement Prize 2006 for Bringing The Sun to Canada / Flaming Unisex Award 2007 for Coming to Flaming Unisex Awards / Random Books Award 2006 for Random Words Which Sometimes Sell / Happy Housekeepers Award 2007 for Being an Example to Follow / Wild Foresters Award 2006 for Saving Trees from Book Lovers / Writing Bodybuilders Award 2007 for Keeping Nice Forms / Life Coaching Without Words Award 2006 for Bringing New Life to Some Words / Writing for Writing Foundation Award 2007 for Rewriting Some Writings / Speaking Parr.

(Tomm's bokomslag påminner för övrigt mycket om Ali Smith's.)

Det är inte ofta jag säger det här, men ibland är mer faktiskt mer. Mycket mer.